OPEN POST

[enteloki]

throw anything at me 

 

NSFW OPEN POST

 

Comments

[enteloki]

[GET BLOCKED, IDIOT.]

[placation]

[ Fair enough!

Twenty minutes later, Akechi receives an email notification, again using an anonymous masking service. ]

FROM: j11200202@noreply.co.jp

Cats share 95.6% of their DNA with tigers! ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎

[enteloki]

[Wow, it's not even noon and Maruki is on his last nerve! Time to be a petulant little shit.]

Not true.

[placation]

Command not recognized

To cancel your subscription to Cat Facts, please respond "Nyaa thank you!"

[enteloki]

[DEATH!!! DEATH TO MARUKI.

Akechi texts MARUKI'S NUMBER.]

I have a fact for you.

1/2 - email

[placation]

Thank you for continuing your subscription to Cat Facts! You will receive one Cat Fact per hour.

To decrease the interval, please respond "Meowre facts, please!"

annnnd text

[placation]

Auto response: I am currently seeing students, please expect a response after school hours have concluded

1/2

[enteloki]

[TWO CAN PLAY AT THIS GAME.

And unlike Maruki, Akechi has all goddamn day. Netflix, paused. This is all he cares about now.

There is a long delay and-]

[enteloki]

[Two attachments come through.]

one hour later - email

[placation]

The ability of a cat to find its way home is called “psi-traveling.” Experts think cats either use the angle of the sunlight to find their way or that cats have magnetized cells in their brains that act as compasses.

ദ്ദി（• ˕ •マ.ᐟ

[enteloki]

[ANOTHER ATTACHMENT SENT TO MARUKI'S PHONE!!!]

[placation]

Do you not know how to read my auto response? I'm trying to work...

[enteloki]

You're really going to keep playing dumb?

[placation]

???

[enteloki]

Playing stupid won't save you.

Cat facts? Really?

[placation]

[ yes it will. gaslight gaslight gaslight ]

Oh no... Did someone sign you up for cat facts?

I wonder if it's the same person signing me up for pyramid schemes and crypto scams... Such a dangerous criminal should be dealt with.

[enteloki]

[Gaslight? Akechi? You gaslight? Akechi Goro? In this economy? In front of his salad?]

Perhaps they even live in the same household. Wouldn't that be interesting?

Maybe if one stops, the other will as well. There's something to be said about the dualities in life - one begets another, one ends another.

[placation]

[ oh, jail for mamaruki! jail for mamaruki for one thousand years!!! ]

No... That sounds too crazy to be true. What are the odds?

Anyway, I don't have time to get into Descartes now, I have another student coming in soon. But I hope your cat facts culprit sees the error of their ways!

[enteloki]

[ten thousand years PRISON FOR GASLIGHT GATEKEEP MAMARUKI!!!! ready for the mlm big leagues.]

Ah, that's a shame. I'm already getting messages about your bank cards being cancelled for potential fraud.

Well, I'm sure you don't need money to get home today. I'll continue my investigation and let you know what comes of it.

[placation]

How did we come to the point where you get fraud notifications like that and I don't?

Fine.

Truce.

[enteloki]

Maybe you're getting them, but those auto responses are blocking it from appearing.

Or perhaps the bank notification settings were changed by that deviant bitcoin scammer.

Your surrender is accepted. Thank you. I'll provide some funds for the subway, however I suggest you call the bank to get this mess sorted out soon.

[PAYPAY RECIEVED FROM AKECHI GORO ¥210.]

[placation]

How benevolent of you. And I don't even have to pick up your dinner? We're really scaling the ranks.

[enteloki]

We can't afford dinner with your cards blocked.

I will be expecting a rain check for it though. Please keep that in mind.

email : )

[placation]

Re: email : )

[enteloki]

[WALK HOME BITCH.

HE SUBMITS A REFUND FOR HIS GENEROUS PAYPAY MONEY.]