[Stop talking. Eren faces the mirror. It's a long ten seconds or so before he can actually see the vaguest details of his own face. It doesn't look right in the dark, but he's seen it before - muttered to himself until he was shouting instead, gripping the edges of a metal sink.
[His reflection doesn't change. Eren is too aware of Akechi, breathing quietly beside him. He does his best not to glance over, but the other man's reflection is facing him too. He finds himself trained on Akechi's eyes.]
[Akechi is a man on a mission and that mission is inciting hallucinations in a dark room to prove a book right or wrong. Zoning out is a skill he's long mastered. Breathing, the pervasive presence of another only centimeters away - all are easy to force out of his mind.
So he stares. Leans forward - presses hands to the counter and keeps his gaze level on the reflection like a cat seeing itself for the first time. The darkness becomes a non-issue as his eyes adjust to it. He feels a pair on him. Ignores it for the greater purpose of whatever the fuck this is. Eren will speak up if something needs noting.
Then it happens. A minute, maybe two - Akechi's will is strong, but a cognition is a powerful overrider of it.
The reflection's pupils widen - larger, overriding the whites. Flat lips twist up and down and fade into a thin line going inward. Invisible fingertips form indents along his arms, shoulders - look like they're gripping to pull and peel apart clothes and skin and-
Goosebumps form along his spine. It's bizarre. Weird and-
He laughs.
It's so goddamn stupid. All the training and mental stress endured in the Metaverse can't withstand two minutes looking in a fucking mirror.
It's funny. Tone light - entertained by the absurdity of it all. He keeps watching to see what else this shit does.]
[The trick doesn't work - not for Eren, anyway. He can't look away from Akechi no matter how hard he tries; truthfully, he doesn't try that hard at all.
[The silence is shattered by bright, loud laughter, and Eren feels goosebumps prickle up all over his body, his heart beating in his throat.
[He shouldn't. He knows he shouldn't. He doesn't care. Akechi can kill him if he wants to.
[He puts one hand on the man's lower back, another to his cheek. He steps in close, leans forward, and capture's Akechi's lips in a kiss.]
[The smallest part of his brain registers Eren touching his back - it's all too common, all too normalized as a part of their routine. Warmth against his cheek pulls him away from the mirror. Heat against his lips -
Infuriates. Eren really thinks he can get away with whatever he wants, at any opportunity.
Maybe it's because Aubrey's gone. Maybe she let him get away with stuff like this and he's trying to find a replacement in Akechi Goro. It's pathetic.
He ignores his own lips moving against Eren's, as if they do this. As if he wants to open the man's mouth with his tongue. As if he only needs to act, not think, when this happens. Akechi knows better.
An arm rests on Eren's shoulder without a second thought - pulls back just as quick. Raises up to the man's face like he's going to mimic the gesture on his own cheek, only to push Eren's face away and break the connection by force.
Akechi resists the temptation to dig his fingers into Eren's cheek - does so anyway, until he can see dark indents from his nails even in the pitch black room.
Whatever's gotten into him ends now.]
Knock it off or I'll do worse than a little scratch.
cw: there's a lot of dubcon/non-con adjacent language in this tag but it's not real don't believe it
[There it is, their little dance. It may as well be foreplay at this point, to threaten each other the way they do. Eren feels stinging on his cheek, and then his head is pushed away. Good, because then Eren can take his face and force their lips together again, good because Akechi will rage and bite and shove, good because one day he may actually rip Eren's heart out of his chest and bite it in half--
[Not tonight. Tonight, Eren takes a step back and drops his arms at his side. Tonight, Eren's heart isn't eaten, just broken. Tonight, he doesn't want to fight. Maybe that will enrage Akechi more than anything. He doesn't know. He doesn't care. Can't care.
[He loves him anyway. Akechi's lips moved warm against his, and he's grateful, even if only for that.
[His right hand twists at his side. His throat is tight. His voice matches it.]
I'm glad-- [You're still here? No. Akechi would hate that. He doesn't want to be here. Aubrey leaving was a good thing.
[Eren swallows down something hard in his throat, eyes momentarily rolling up to the ceiling. He lets out what might be a laugh, but it isn't one.]
Eren doesn't pull back - won't listen and oblige Akechi's rejection. He gets in a mood and they end up in a different kind of battle. One he doesn't dislike. Based on a mutual unspoken want and hatred.
Eren pulls back. Looks up. Makes a noise that might be pained. Shows weakness in this dark room. Maybe he thinks Akechi is another shadow protecting him from the unjust world that takes and takes and takes.
I'm glad I got to see you tonight is sincere. Reminds him of sitting in a tunnel that exposed a heart. Eren doesn't deserve mercy, but Akechi sees a debt to repay in quiet grief.]
[It feels like an odd request, but Eren really has no reason to think so. Maybe it's the lack of ire that surprises him, but he feels too tired to remain surprised for long. Even a sick dog can follow a basic command. Eren sits on the edge of the bathtub. His reflection never did take on a life of its own.]
[Akechi sits next to him - close, only the smallest sliver of space separating. It's uncomfortable.
Quiet.
He doesn't break the silence for a minute, then two and-]
Let me be blunt-
[Whatever's happening Eren's head has to stop. They don't have the luxury to lament the loss of those always meant to leave.]
Aubrey is a strong woman - you helped her become that. Physically. Mentally. Even without powers, I feel as if her will rivaled those of gods at times. In her reality, or should she be pulled back here or to any others, nothing will shake her again. She'll go on to live a long life, unburdened by an unjust world. Your bond with her allowed her heart to be free.
[It's a lie - it's the truth. He hates Aubrey. He doesn't miss her. Wonders if all her friends greeted her the day she arrived back.]
You have a power to make others stronger - this cannot with her. With the rest of your entourage. With Maruki or whoever else you deem worthy in this moment. It's a gift you have that no one else can match and our greatest asset in this fight.
[It's dark. He can see still see the grooves between the tile under their feet - follows the lines with his eyes up to the cabinet and back.]
For as long as these lights are off, you can grieve to your heart's content - do whatever you wish. I won't hear or see a thing, just as you didn't a few weeks ago. I'll allow this much and I'll remain here to ensure this room stays yours.
[No one will come in. He'll send a nasty text about it if they try. There's more than one bathroom in this place.
But when they flip the lights back on and leave-]
Do you understand?
hopefully akechi lets him do this, but if not, I can adjust my tag - also die
[It's strange. It's strange because it isn't, somehow. Akechi's words are undeniably kind. He may as well be giving a pep talk. His voice is his own though. He says it like Akechi Goro would say it; so, Eren can start to believe it, or, at least, believe that Akechi really feels that way.
[It matters to him how Akechi feels.
["Your bond with her allowed her heart to be free."
[Since when does Akechi Goro speak to matters of the heart? "Do you understand"? He knows grief. "Do you understand?" He knows Eren. "Do you understand?"
[Eren starts to nod, but it's too dark to see. He whispers a hoarse, "Yes."
[And then he feels for Akechi's hand. He takes it. He pulls it over onto his thigh and lays his other hand over it. The muscles in his fingers twitch and shift, but he doesn't let go. He stares forward, and it's black, silent.
[Every once in a while, there's a quiet
drip
drip
drip
[on the tile.
[And that's all. Until Akechi stands up, turns on the light, that's all.]
[Later, Akechi will speak to him in this empty, lightless room that protects - offer unprompted advice in a near silent whisper. 'Don't form bonds that will ruin you. If that means being alone, that's what it requires.' Weakness is a luxury. Eren is allowed one moment because he gave one when Akechi didn't know he needed it most. He gets one to repay a debt. He gets one-
Because that's what allies are supposed to do. It's the image he's trying to convey. It's a mercy kind hearted princes give, even though that vision vanishes in front of Eren more often than not these days.
He gets one because the warm hand clasping his against a thigh is a lifeline. Akechi reached for one in the throes of his grief as a child, and never got it. Eren should receive the same treatment. Eren knows he can't rely on people, so reaching out now should be punished.
Akechi doesn't move. Stays ramrod straight, completely still, and does nothing as promised for the duration of their time in there. Ignores noise. Doesn't even turn towards Eren. Fills the silence with thoughts about this world, this reality, the numerous others waiting and the singular one they'll all return to.
However long it takes, Akechi stays. However long this lasts, he waits. When Eren loosens the grip on his hand, he pulls back. When they stand-
Akechi pulls at the loose hairs at the back of Eren's head - readjusts the bun because he's absolutely pathetic and they can't leave a dark bathroom together looking like a mess. The line of questioning that would follow-
He doesn't want to deal with it.
'That's all the time you get' are his final parting words before a blaring, brilliant light shines over them.]
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no subject
[Stop talking. Eren faces the mirror. It's a long ten seconds or so before he can actually see the vaguest details of his own face. It doesn't look right in the dark, but he's seen it before - muttered to himself until he was shouting instead, gripping the edges of a metal sink.
[His reflection doesn't change. Eren is too aware of Akechi, breathing quietly beside him. He does his best not to glance over, but the other man's reflection is facing him too. He finds himself trained on Akechi's eyes.]
no subject
So he stares. Leans forward - presses hands to the counter and keeps his gaze level on the reflection like a cat seeing itself for the first time. The darkness becomes a non-issue as his eyes adjust to it. He feels a pair on him. Ignores it for the greater purpose of whatever the fuck this is. Eren will speak up if something needs noting.
Then it happens. A minute, maybe two - Akechi's will is strong, but a cognition is a powerful overrider of it.
The reflection's pupils widen - larger, overriding the whites. Flat lips twist up and down and fade into a thin line going inward. Invisible fingertips form indents along his arms, shoulders - look like they're gripping to pull and peel apart clothes and skin and-
Goosebumps form along his spine. It's bizarre. Weird and-
He laughs.
It's so goddamn stupid. All the training and mental stress endured in the Metaverse can't withstand two minutes looking in a fucking mirror.
It's funny. Tone light - entertained by the absurdity of it all. He keeps watching to see what else this shit does.]
cw: uhhhhh this is maybe dubcon (sfw) idrk
[The silence is shattered by bright, loud laughter, and Eren feels goosebumps prickle up all over his body, his heart beating in his throat.
[He shouldn't. He knows he shouldn't. He doesn't care. Akechi can kill him if he wants to.
[He puts one hand on the man's lower back, another to his cheek. He steps in close, leans forward, and capture's Akechi's lips in a kiss.]
no subject
Infuriates. Eren really thinks he can get away with whatever he wants, at any opportunity.
Maybe it's because Aubrey's gone. Maybe she let him get away with stuff like this and he's trying to find a replacement in Akechi Goro. It's pathetic.
He ignores his own lips moving against Eren's, as if they do this. As if he wants to open the man's mouth with his tongue. As if he only needs to act, not think, when this happens. Akechi knows better.
An arm rests on Eren's shoulder without a second thought - pulls back just as quick. Raises up to the man's face like he's going to mimic the gesture on his own cheek, only to push Eren's face away and break the connection by force.
Akechi resists the temptation to dig his fingers into Eren's cheek - does so anyway, until he can see dark indents from his nails even in the pitch black room.
Whatever's gotten into him ends now.]
Knock it off or I'll do worse than a little scratch.
cw: there's a lot of dubcon/non-con adjacent language in this tag but it's not real don't believe it
[Not tonight. Tonight, Eren takes a step back and drops his arms at his side. Tonight, Eren's heart isn't eaten, just broken. Tonight, he doesn't want to fight. Maybe that will enrage Akechi more than anything. He doesn't know. He doesn't care. Can't care.
[He loves him anyway. Akechi's lips moved warm against his, and he's grateful, even if only for that.
[His right hand twists at his side. His throat is tight. His voice matches it.]
I'm glad-- [You're still here? No. Akechi would hate that. He doesn't want to be here. Aubrey leaving was a good thing.
[Eren swallows down something hard in his throat, eyes momentarily rolling up to the ceiling. He lets out what might be a laugh, but it isn't one.]
I'm glad I got to see you tonight.
no subject
Eren doesn't pull back - won't listen and oblige Akechi's rejection. He gets in a mood and they end up in a different kind of battle. One he doesn't dislike. Based on a mutual unspoken want and hatred.
Eren pulls back. Looks up. Makes a noise that might be pained. Shows weakness in this dark room. Maybe he thinks Akechi is another shadow protecting him from the unjust world that takes and takes and takes.
I'm glad I got to see you tonight is sincere. Reminds him of sitting in a tunnel that exposed a heart. Eren doesn't deserve mercy, but Akechi sees a debt to repay in quiet grief.]
Sit down.
I'm already sick please
get sicker
Quiet.
He doesn't break the silence for a minute, then two and-]
Let me be blunt-
[Whatever's happening Eren's head has to stop. They don't have the luxury to lament the loss of those always meant to leave.]
Aubrey is a strong woman - you helped her become that. Physically. Mentally. Even without powers, I feel as if her will rivaled those of gods at times. In her reality, or should she be pulled back here or to any others, nothing will shake her again. She'll go on to live a long life, unburdened by an unjust world. Your bond with her allowed her heart to be free.
[It's a lie - it's the truth. He hates Aubrey. He doesn't miss her. Wonders if all her friends greeted her the day she arrived back.]
You have a power to make others stronger - this cannot with her. With the rest of your entourage. With Maruki or whoever else you deem worthy in this moment. It's a gift you have that no one else can match and our greatest asset in this fight.
[It's dark. He can see still see the grooves between the tile under their feet - follows the lines with his eyes up to the cabinet and back.]
For as long as these lights are off, you can grieve to your heart's content - do whatever you wish. I won't hear or see a thing, just as you didn't a few weeks ago. I'll allow this much and I'll remain here to ensure this room stays yours.
[No one will come in. He'll send a nasty text about it if they try. There's more than one bathroom in this place.
But when they flip the lights back on and leave-]
Do you understand?
hopefully akechi lets him do this, but if not, I can adjust my tag - also die
[It matters to him how Akechi feels.
["Your bond with her allowed her heart to be free."
[Since when does Akechi Goro speak to matters of the heart? "Do you understand"? He knows grief. "Do you understand?" He knows Eren. "Do you understand?"
[Eren starts to nod, but it's too dark to see. He whispers a hoarse, "Yes."
[And then he feels for Akechi's hand. He takes it. He pulls it over onto his thigh and lays his other hand over it. The muscles in his fingers twitch and shift, but he doesn't let go. He stares forward, and it's black, silent.
[Every once in a while, there's a quiet
drip
drip
[on the tile.
[And that's all. Until Akechi stands up, turns on the light, that's all.]
cw: ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Because that's what allies are supposed to do. It's the image he's trying to convey. It's a mercy kind hearted princes give, even though that vision vanishes in front of Eren more often than not these days.
He gets one because the warm hand clasping his against a thigh is a lifeline. Akechi reached for one in the throes of his grief as a child, and never got it. Eren should receive the same treatment. Eren knows he can't rely on people, so reaching out now should be punished.
Akechi doesn't move. Stays ramrod straight, completely still, and does nothing as promised for the duration of their time in there. Ignores noise. Doesn't even turn towards Eren. Fills the silence with thoughts about this world, this reality, the numerous others waiting and the singular one they'll all return to.
However long it takes, Akechi stays. However long this lasts, he waits. When Eren loosens the grip on his hand, he pulls back. When they stand-
Akechi pulls at the loose hairs at the back of Eren's head - readjusts the bun because he's absolutely pathetic and they can't leave a dark bathroom together looking like a mess. The line of questioning that would follow-
He doesn't want to deal with it.
'That's all the time you get' are his final parting words before a blaring, brilliant light shines over them.]